How to Show Yourself Love This Valentine's Day

Write yourself a love letter

I once did something similar to this in a class, and it was pretty profound. We’re so used to pointing out our flaws that it’s hard to sit down and really think about what we love about ourselves. But writing it out and seeing it? That just hits different.

So grab a notebook and pen, and take a moment to reflect on what you love and appreciate about yourself. And listen—no snarky add-ons or self-deprecating comments. (I’ve caught myself doing it before, so just a heads-up!) This might take some deep digging, but trust me, you do have strengths. Even if they aren’t “typical” strengths, they’re yours. Also, think about your growth and progress, and give yourself permission to feel proud of how far you’ve come.

For me, seeing it all written out helps me recognize my accomplishments and appreciate myself more.

Create a self love ritual

Okay y’all, for me, this looks like my morning coffee (or let’s be real, coffee anytime), kitty cuddles during TV time, reading a paranormal romance novel (or writing one), and so much more. Over the years, I’ve collected hobbies that I genuinely enjoy with myself.

What do you enjoy doing for you? Do you try to sneak in a chapter of your latest book? Pour yourself a glass of wine (or your beverage of choice), grab your phone/iPad/book, and relax in a hot bath? That sounds amazing. There are so many possibilities—maybe you throw on some background TV noise and crochet (or learn to crochet—it’s pretty fun!).

Whatever it is, dedicate time just for yourself. Self-love is important. We got this!

Treat yourself to something special

Starbucks (or honestly, any coffee chain), anyone? Haha. Depending on the time of year, I have my go-to drinks. I usually choose Starbucks because mobile ordering is so convenient, but we all know coffee shop prices are ridiculous these days—even my local one has gotten pricier. But hey, it’s still my little treat to myself!

What’s your treat? A sweater you’ve been eyeing? A bouquet of flowers just for you? Your favorite meal or dessert? Whatever it is, it doesn’t have to be expensive—just something that makes you happy. Because self-love isn’t just about kind words—it’s about action, too.

Practice gratitude

Grab a piece of paper and a pen. Write down three things you’re grateful for right now. I’ll wait…

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Here are mine:

• I’m grateful for my ability to walk.
• I’m grateful for my cats, especially on the tough days.
• I’m grateful for time.

I wholeheartedly believe that gratitude can shift your mindset, even if some days it takes constant reminders. It helps you focus on what you have rather than what’s lacking.

We can always find negatives in life—they’re everywhere. But positives? They’re there, too, even if they’re harder to see. I don’t know what I’d do without my cats. They’ve helped me through so much mentally, whether it’s comforting me or making me laugh with their crazy antics.

Your gratitude list doesn’t have to be grand. If you’re grateful you got out of bed today, write it down. That matters.

set boundaries and say no

A huge part of self-love is protecting your time and energy. Some people, whether they realize it or not, drain your energy—especially if they constantly bring negativity. It just is what it is. Protect yourself by saying no when you need to—whether that’s declining an event, skipping a hangout, or just taking space.

It’s hard, trust me. I still struggle with it. But with practice, it gets easier.

You are under no obligation to please anyone but yourself. And if someone gets upset about your boundaries? That’s their issue, not yours. (Of course, we aim to be respectful, but still.)

Give yourself permission to say no when it doesn’t align with you.

Reflect on your wins

Think about your accomplishments—big or small—and give yourself credit for them. This could even be part of your gratitude list.

• Completed that one annoying work task? Hell yeah!
• Finished a big paper for school? Celebrate that!

If you’d like, I’ve seen this idea all over Pinterest—create a self-love jar. Write down your wins and store them in a jar. Then, on tough days, pull one out and remind yourself of how far you’ve come.

It’s so easy to forget our progress when life gets chaotic, so having a visual reminder can be a game-changer.

Create a vision board for yourself

Alrighty, so here’s a YouTube video that explains how I use my vision board. I just got a small one that fits on my wall, and I’m so excited to start this journey again!

Video Credit: How to Make a Vision Board That Really Works by Kirk Duncan, 3 Key Elements).

I love how he sets up his board and breaks down the steps to make those goals happen.

I’ve successfully checked things off my vision board before, so I’m hyped for this round!

Have you tried making a vision board before? If so, how did it work for you? Let me know in the comments or over on Instagram @shiftingthruchaos!

Practice positive affirmations

One of my favorite self-love practices (obviously… haha) is positive affirmations!

Start your day with one that resonates with you. I like to keep a set of 12 handy, but really, you just need one good one.

If you’re looking for some, I’ve got a collection of self-love affirmations in my store! But even a quick Google search will do the trick. The key is to repeat your affirmation throughout the day—especially when self-doubt creeps in.

Here are a few to get you started:

• I am enough just as I am.
• I am worthy of love.
• I am proud of my accomplishments, both big and small.

Conclusion

So this Valentine’s Day, remember—love doesn’t just come from others; it comes from YOU, too!

Take the time to nurture yourself, recognize your worth, and celebrate your journey. That’s the best gift you can give yourself.

Now, tell me—how will you practice self-love this year? Let me know in the comments or over on Instagram @shiftingthruchaos!

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