Real Stories, Real Insights

So… May turned out to be a month of rest. Not exactly what was planned, but apparently it was definitely needed. I had these plans of writing a blog every Sunday, posting regularly on Instagram and Facebook, maybe even being the Queen of Showing Up™️.

*Tentatively raises hand* Let me see 'em, y’all. How many of y’all have felt guilty for resting—in any sort of way? You’d think rest would be easy, right? Noooooooo. At least not for me.

Y’all, there are just some days I want to take a breather, slow down, and just rest. Sometimes that means sleep, sometimes it’s staying in pajamas all day, or just doing nothing at all. I want to, y’all. I do.

There have been many moments in my life where I've wondered, "What's wrong with me?" On paper, everything looks great, but applying that to real life? That's a whole different story.​

Here I am, almost 40 years old, working in a local vape shop, still trying to figure out who I am. A good portion of my adult life has been spent searching for the answer to that question and honestly, I still don’t really know.

It seems like this year is going well for me, but I still feel constantly overwhelmed. If it's not one thing, it's another, and it makes me feel overstimulated. My emotions sit right on the surface when I’m overwhelmed—something I realized while writing this. The littlest thing can make me go "grrrr." And honestly, I get a bit annoyed at myself for it. But hey, I’m learning.

Life can be a mess. Some days, it feels like everything is on fire, and you’re just standing there, coffee in one hand, wondering if you should bother grabbing a fire extinguisher or just roast some marshmallows. In times like that, comfort matters. Whether it’s food, clothes, or just the softest blanket ever, having those go-to items can make all the difference.

Alrighty y'all. Mindful and positive self-talk is something I still struggle with — and honestly, admitting that feels embarrassing. I know damn well I’d never let my friends talk to themselves the way I talk to myself, so why do I still allow it? Trauma, probably.

I know for a fact that I cannot be the only one that struggles with the myths out there—what we’ve told ourselves and what we’ve heard from other people. A couple I’ve heard and said to myself are, “You’re lazy. You’re not good enough. I wish I was smarter.” The list can go on and on. But I can tell you—those thoughts, and your brain, are lying.

Sticking with the theme of self-love and self-care, I wanted to have a bit of fun with this one. We can learn a lot from our critters.

When we think of Valentine's Day, we usually think of cutesy couple things, right? In this age, maybe not so much—but let’s change the narrative anyway. Let’s take February 14th as an opportunity for self-love instead (which, let’s be real, we should be practicing year-round… haha).

"I'll never be good enough." It's something I still struggle with, and I find it annoying that it still affects me, but I guess that's why I’m here with y’all as well! Haha. There’s a lot that can contribute to this type of thinking, and I’m still learning new things every day. I’m pretty damn confident it stems from childhood to early adulthood. I can tell you I was very co-dependent. I went from living at home (in a very remote area with little social interaction outside of school) to living with a roommate, and then getting married at 18. I hadn’t lived on my own until I got divorced. Some of these things I didn’t realize until after. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, but I believe it started in childhood and progressed into adulthood. Now, I’m nearing middle age and still figuring it out...woohoo. Hahaha.